Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Decapitating St. Joseph

Who wants to hear a funny story that summarizes how awesome I am?

Remember our first house

We wanted to sell it so we didn’t have to pay for it and our new house…even though two mortgages did sound really fun…

This lovely home was on the market for 2 or 3 months with no lookers.  I was stressing out…because that’s what I do best. I then heard about a centuries-old tradition claiming that burying a statue of St. Joseph in the yard helps homes sell faster.  Bury a statue and sell your home.  Sounds like it will totally work.  I’m in.  What could go wrong?

I set off to the nearest Christian store to look for my statue.  $12 and he was mine.

I get home and excitedly open the package…bring on the closing!  I then accidently drop St. Joseph onto the counter.  His head breaks off….and rolls under the stove…seriously.  I wish I was making this up.

I start crying hysterically.  I call Nate and freak him out.  I’m so hysterical that he thinks I was in a car wreck or Ike ran away.  Nope, I just ruined the sale of our home…forever….and St. Joseph’s head is still under the stove. This can’t be good.

Nate gets home. He retrieves St. Joseph’s head and suggests that I superglue it back on…(I was also really good with a camera back in the day…)

Good as new right? I buried him according to the “directions”. Our home didn’t sell for another 7 months. 

I meant to dig him back up before we moved…but I forgot.  I wonder how freaked out the new owners will be to find a saint with a super glued head wrapped in sock.

Does burying St. Joseph help you sell your house?  Well, ours sold…but not quickly (but how quick is quick in the housing market?).  Maybe we should add some clause for extra months of ownership for mishandling the saint?

What crazy things have you done to sell a home?


  1. too funny! a client of mine told me about this just yesterday... wonder if it took 7 months because it is a myth or because he had been decapitated!

  2. HA! So funny. I had never heard that before! Glad the house sold eventually, despite the saint mishandling. : )

  3. Haha! Hilarious! Sounds like something I would do. Whenever we decide to move and sell our house, I'll bury a (hopefully not decapitated) statue and let you know how fast we sell. :)

  4. Someone told me to do this, but I just haven't had a chance. I'm really open to just about anything at this point.

  5. Sooo funny! I laughed out loud at the picture with his head off. This is something I'd totally do too!

    My grandmother's first daycare that she built, she had to end up selling in her divorce (to pay the settlement). Well she had sunk her grandchildren's hand prints and first locks of hair into it when she built it to "build it with love". She freaked out the buyers by saying she used hair in the foundation. They probably thought she meant horse hair or something crazy.

  6. Oh dear. I can only imagine what those people might think when (if?) they find him in his sock. ;)

  7. That is such a funny story!!! The best part is that you took photos and were able to turn it into a blog post years later:)

  8. Haha! Oops. Glad it ended up selling. Took us 13 months to sell ours in 2008! (This was in Utah.) Two payments for that long was not fun!!

  9. I had a similar statue and the same exact thing happened to me. His head broke off! I tried gluing it with several types, I even tried to tape it back on and nothing would stick. So I buried him with his head very close to where it should be.
    We ended up under contract a few days later. I also got statues for 2 co-workers and their homes sold shortly there after. I think there is something to it!

  10. Awesome! I kind of wonder if St. Joseph is haunting the house now? Like Nearly Headless Nick from Harry Potter?

  11. Oh my God (I mean Gosh), I'm laughing so hard and I'm at work where I'm not supposed to be surfing the net. I can totally picture the head rolling under the stove and you standing there with the body. No wonder you cried. Glad you can laugh about it now. I've never used St Joseph since I haven't yet sold a house, but I hear that they now sell the biodegradeable kind so it's friendly to all.

  12. I am dying right now. Poor St. Joe.
    I too purchased a St. Joseph's statue to sell our last house. I believe he worked 'cause our house sold in 5 weeks :)
    That said, I looked like a crazy lady digging around for him the day we moved. I only had a spoon because everything else was packed. I never did find him.

  13. I had totally forgotten about this but now I can remember you crying hysterically and calling me wondering what was going to happen to you since you broke him. Just goes to show, you are definitely your mother's daughter. LOL :) Mom

  14. Oh, Michelle! That's the funniest story I've heard all day! Love it! :)

  15. only you Michelle! you crack me up!!!

  16. I purchased and buried St. Joseph in our front yard the day we put our house on the market. My husband and I said a prayer....we aren't really religious people either...and it sold in 6 days! I read online that you should take the statue with you to each house, so I dug it up and have it ready for the next sale!

  17. We did the same thing. When we burried it, we faced him toward our front door. (Don't remember why...) We had an offer in 4 weeks and 2 more after the first fell through. St Joseph sits proudly on our mantle and looks over the house. (We have been blessed for sure... we have made so many improvements and will soon be putting on a dinning room/mudroom/masterbath addition.) Sure helps to pray a lot!


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